Category Archives: Humour

The great Broad Bean God

Standard

My first broadbean seedlings are emerging and I found this on a Melbourne site called very edible gardens:

http://www.veryediblegardens.com/iveg/vegetable-lore

Worship

Despite the rich cultural heritage, no civilisation has ever, so far as we know, worshipped a broad bean god – which seams like a terrible oversight given the bean’s awe inspiring properties. Therefore we give you a god of our own creation: Lord Fava, the best and only broad bean god to have ever existed. He is great and powerful. Love and fear him. If you have a pre-existing blood condition, he might smite you. But for the rest of us he brings fertility and protein. His hands are surrounded by powerful balls of nitrogen fixing nodules. They are filled with magical microbes, his familiars. I say ‘he’ but ‘he’, like most plants, is hermaphroditic. No body knows what’s underneath that loin cloth.

Join us in prayer, and the sacrifice of a young goat, as we thank Lord Fava and the Broad Beans.

lordfava